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7-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: Officer McSexy struts past the door with an exaggeratedly large behind. A police chief calls, "McSexy, get in here." Panel 2: McSexy enters the office. The chief says, "That BBL is against department policy." Panel 3: The chief asks, "How you gonna catch perps with a behind that big?" Panel 4: McSexy replies, "Chief, I got a secret weapon up my sleeve." Panel 5: McSexy looks over his shoulder, grinning. "Or should I say…" Panel 6: He turns around, revealing a concealed weapon between the cheeks. "Up my cheeks!" POW POW. Panel 7: The chief stands amid the destruction, impressed. "McSexy! You beautiful fool!"

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4-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: A pink worm stands at a podium before a crowd of insects. "Welcome to this year's Bug Conference." Panel 2: Close-up of the worm at the podium. "Firstly, the stick bug would like to remind everyone, they're not a coat rack." Panel 3: A stick bug stands in a spotlight, covered in hats, coats, scarves, and accessories hung on every limb. Panel 4: Close-up of the stick bug resigning: "Thanks, Janet."

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4-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: The Grim Reaper approaches a building labelled "FART FACTORY," saying, "Oh no. I knew this day would come." Panel 2: Inside the factory, surrounded by green pipes and workers in lab coats, the Reaper announces: "Sorry, guys. I'm here to take all of you." Panel 3: The workers panic. "Gasp! What was it?" One cries, "Ah, my kids…" Panel 4: The Reaper clarifies: "Leak in pipe 3. And Carl." Carl clicks his lighter, confused: "Huh?"

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4-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: A man on a candlelit date with Slutty Witch asks, "Did you just… come?" Panel 2: Close-up of Slutty Witch, flustered. "I did!" Panel 3: The man looks hopeful. "Because of my detailed analysis of the works of Quentin Tarantino?" Panel 4: Slutty Witch, sweating. "No, but I left my voodoo doll with my girlfriend."

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Everyone is looking for the fountain of youth–but dare we say, we probably found it.

It’s a fact, that laughter extends your life. Nothing rejuvenates the mind, body, and soul like a good chuckle. And we mean that whole-hearted laughter that comes from actual human-made art, not whatever algorithm-generated slop is currently clogging your feed like arterial plaque.

A scientist in a white lab coat stands on a ladder, pouring a small blue figure into a large yellow laboratory flask filled with bubbling blue liquid. The flask is heated by flames underneath and connected to tubes, suggesting an experimental setup for creating longevity.

Now, here’s our proposition: You get the ultimate longevity hack, the key to an endless stream of funny stuff, and we get to make a living.

Our supporters on Patreon are already in on it. They’re not just getting bonus comics, early access, and downloadable art – though they are getting those things. No, what they’re really getting is more life.

Think about it. Every comic you see before the general public is another laugh you get ahead of the mortality curve. You’re literally time-traveling into a funnier, longer future. The rest of the world is brain-rotting away while you’re chuckling at Sunday’s comic on a Friday like some dashing Doc Brown.

The experiment has grown into an enormous, complex contraption with multiple levels, gears, tubes, and chambers. Scientists work at different stations around the towering apparatus. Blue figures appear at various points in the machine, with one visible in a display window. The machinery suggests an increasingly elaborate longevity manufacturing process.

Join Now

A Funnier, Longer Life

If you want to take your hack to the next level, you can sign up for an actual physical love letter. In the mail. Remember mail? That thing that used to bring us things other than bills and ads?

This love letter arrives filled with a holographic sticker, a surprise item from the exclusive subscriber vault of wonders (cartoon magnets that will hold your nephew’s drawing to your fridge way better than those real estate agent freebies; bumper stickers that might cause a pile-up on the freeway; key chains that will hold your keys while also broadcasting your artistic taste), sealed with actual love and confetti.

When was the last time you opened your mail and confetti fell onto your driveway? When was the last time anything in your life involved confetti that wasn’t shredding financial documents before your shady boss’s tax audit. This confetti celebrates your longer life.

The final stage shows a scientist packaging blue figures (representing humor/laughter) into a box at a desk. A delivery person with a hand truck carries stacked boxes labeled 'Funny Comics' with a smiley face and an upward arrow, ready to distribute the longevity product to the world.

Join Now

Don’t Die

The science is unimpeachable: human-made art makes you laugh, laughter releases endorphins, endorphins are basically tiny maintenance workers repairing your insides, and boom: you’ve just extended your warranty.

And unlike those sketchy supplement companies or that one guy in Yoga class who won’t shut up about intermittent fasting, we’re offering you a path to longevity that involves more laughter, not less food.

So really becoming a Patreon supporter isn’t just supporting an artist. It’s an investment in your own continued existence. Your move, mortal.

Join Now

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5-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: A female green goblin officer rides a broomstick, chasing a witch. She yells, “Stop!” under a crescent moon. Panel 2: The goblin says, “Do you know how fast you were–” before the witch interrupts, “Officer! I’m late for a date!” Panel 3: The witch, exasperated, sighs, “Do you know how hard it is to find a reasonable guy nowadays?” Panel 4: She continues, “HE DOESN’T EVEN HAVE A PODCAST!” Panel 5: The goblin, resigned, waves the witch off: “Okay, GO!” as the witch speeds away into the night.

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Having 1 million followers is like throwing confetti into a hurricane: people cheer, platforms profit, and you’re left sweeping your own glitter off the floor. Everyone loves the art, shares it, while we’re over here perfecting the art of checking our bank balance with one eye closed.

Three-panel meme using scenes from a movie. First panel shows a man saying "You have millions of followers. I think you're good." Second panel shows a blonde woman responding "Social media platforms don't pay their creators." Third panel shows the same man looking shocked/concerned in the rearview mirror of a car.

Platforms Stole Our Pay, AI Stole Our Art

Now AI companies are scraping our “worthless” art to train billion-dollar generators. Apparently our work was valuable enough to steal, just not valuable enough to pay for. It’s like being robbed by someone who insists they’re doing you a favor by “increasing your exposure.”

So here we are on Patreon, asking our actual fans to bridge the gap between “viral content” and “paying rent.” Because in this rigged game, the only reliable currency left is people who genuinely give a damn about creators surviving.

Go to Patreon

Comic strip by War and Peas about the nightmare of a ghost 1. Panel: A ghost wakes up from a bad dream and says to his ghost partner next to him: "Honey, I had a bad dream you died!" 2. Panel: The other ghost tries to comfort him and says: "Sweety, we're already dead." 3. Panel: "We were murdered by that crazy axe killer, remember?" 4. Panel: The first ghost says: "Oh right, what a relief." The moon shines in the room, it's very romantic.

Go to Patreon

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4-panel comic by War and Peas Panel 1: A lonely moon stands on a grassy hill under a night sky, howling “AWOOOOOOO.” Panel 2: The moon stops howling and appears to wait quietly. Panel 3: Other moons from nearby hills join in, also howling “AWOOOOOOOOOO.” Panel 4: A glowing yellow dogwolf appears in the sky, tongue out, floating like a summoned spirit.

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4-panel-comic by War and Peas Panel 1: A woman (thirsty scientist) and a man are seated at a candlelit dinner table. The woman, sipping from a wine glass, says, "So, after I finished my studies..." with a slurping sound effect "Slurrrp" visible. Panel 2: The woman, looking eager, interrupts with clapping hands and says, "Yeah Yeah, that's all great." Panel 3: She asks "But what's your head circumference?" The man, looking puzzled, asks, "I beg your pardon?" Panel 4: The woman, holding an alien mask, responds, "I estimate between 55 and 60 cm." The man, looking shocked, says, "Haha, what?" with a box labeled "Heads 4U" on the floor.

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A cartoon by War and Peas shows a bird sitting in an airplane seat, wearing a seatbelt and angrily saying to a man next to them, "Why don’t you mind your own fuckin’ business."