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War and Peas

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vampire

Dating for Vampires

By warandpeass | September 15, 2024

This is a 4-panel comic by War and Peas featuring a vampire lamenting modern dating and vampire culture. Panel 1: A vampire sits on a purple armchair, holding a smartphone in one hand. He says, "Dating is out of control since those Twilight movies." Panel 2: The vampire, looking more irritated, says, "All of a sudden vampires are cool. Vampires are hot." Panel 3: The vampire reads a message on his phone and says, "Here’s a message: 'Suck me dry, you sexy jagged-tooth Zaddy.'" The phone gives off a notification sound, "Pling." Panel 4: Looking frustrated, the vampire sighs and says, "People under 400 don’t know the art of seduction."

Posted in Comics and tagged as 4 panel comic, comic, comic strip, comics, dark humor, elizabeth pich, funny, hilarious, humor, jonathan kunz, modern dating, pop culture references, supernatural comedy, twilight jokes, vampire, vampire humor, vampire life, vampires, war and peas, webcomic, Yonkoma.

Something Beautiful

By warandpeass | July 28, 2024

This comic strip from "War and Peas" consists of four panels: In the first panel, a woman with pale blue skin and long hair stands at a window and gazes out at a landscape with mountains and a full moon. She says, "There's nothing quite as beautiful as a full moon over the mountains." In the second panel, a witch with a black hat leans out of an adjacent window and replies, "I could think of something." In the third panel, the blue-skinned woman blushes, looks flattered, and says, "Aww... hihi. You're sweet." In the final panel, the witch, with a sinister smile, says, "The terror in the eyes of a man begging for mercy when his life is in your hands!" The blue-skinned woman looks taken aback and responds, "Ookay." The comic concludes with the title "War and Peas" at the bottom.

Posted in Comics and tagged as dating, flrting, love, Slutty Witch, vampire, war and peas, webcomic, witch.

Bunch of D*cks

By warandpeass | June 30, 2024

4-panel-comic by War and Peas: 1st Panel: A black cat (Lord Nibbles) and a mummy are sitting at a poker table. Both are laughing. Someone outside the picture asks, "What is so funny?" 2nd Panel: It's a vampire with male genitals drawn with a red sharpie on his face. He asks "Did you draw something funny on my face while I was dozing off?" 3rd Panel: He leans towards a mirror but there's no reflection. He says, "You guys know I can't see myself in the mirror." 4th panel: He looks at them angrily and says, "It's another bunch of dicks, is it?"

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Posted in Comics and tagged as 4 koma, 4 panel comic, black humor, comic, comic strip, comic strips, comics, dark humor, elizabeth pich, funnies, funny, hilarious, humor, jonathan kunz, lol, lord nibbles, mummy, poker, vamp, vampire, vampires, war and peas, webcomic, Yonkoma.

Mess Castle

By warandpeass | April 21, 2024

4 panel comic by War and Peas. 1. Panel: The vampire enters the room while the witch and the black cat (lord Nibbles) are sitting on the couch watching TV. The vampire says, "You guys, the castle is a mess!" 2. He continues, "There are rotting skulls everywhere from your stupid rituals!" 3. The witch replies, "And you said you'd clean up after your midnight snacks!" 4. A man is heavily bleeding and crawling out of the house. He says "No worries, I'll let myself out!"

Posted in Comics, Dark Humor and tagged as black humor, castle, comic, comic strip, comics, dark humor, lord nibbles, midnight snack, Ritual, Slutty Witch, vamp, vampire, vampires, webcomic, witches, Witchy.

No Idea

By warandpeass | December 31, 2023

4 panel comic by War and Peas. 1. The witch sits on the toilet. She reaches towards the toilet paper but it's empty. She goes, "What the–" 2. She storms over and finds the Vampire and her black cat Lord Nibbles on the couch watching TV. She goes, "Why are we out of toilet paper again?" 3. The Vampire answers, "No idea, babe." The cat says, "Yeah, no idea." 4. Jump cut to the night before. The cat and the vampire are playing poker with a Mummy. A glass of red wine is spilled and gets on the mummy. The mummy says, "Aww. fuck!"

Posted in Comics and tagged as black cat, castle, cat, cats, comic, comic strip, funnies, funny, humor, idea, lol, lord nibbles, mummy, no idea, Slutty Witch, toilet paper, TV, vamp, vampire, war and peas, webcomic, witch, witches.

Vampire Residence

By warandpeass | October 31, 2023

Comic by War and Peas. 1. Panel: A vampire is facing a lynch mob in front of his castle, "What the -" 2. Panel: Vampire: "How do you even know where I live?" 3. Panel: "What gave me away?" 4. Panel: Zoom out. You can now see the super spooky, dark castle vampire.

Posted in Black Humor, Comics, Hilarious Comics and tagged as castle, dark, eerie, halloween, house, lynch, Lynch mob, residence, spooky, vamp, vampire, what gave me away.

Flatmates

By warandpeass | October 22, 2023

4 panel comic by War and Peas. 1. Slutty Witch and her cat Lord Nibbles are sitting on the couch watching Friends. The witch says, "Sitcoms are so unrealistic." 2. "No one ever fights about the dishes... or laundry." 3. She looks at her cat angrily, "Or why ONE flatmate has to hock up their hairballs when the other one has a date!" 4. EARLIER: Slutty Witch is on the bed with a sexy vampire girl. They're about to have sex. Both look startled at something outside of the panel. They hear "ACK ACK" sounds. The vampire says, "Umm, is he okay?"

Posted in Comics, Hilarious Comics, Sexy Humor and tagged as ack, Best of Slutty Witch, black cat, cat, comic, date, dishes, Flatmates, friends, hair ball, hair balls, Hairballs, laundry, lord nibbles, nibbles, sexy time, sitcom, sitcoms, Slutty Witch, vamp, vampire, Vampire girl, Vampire Lady, webcomic, witch, witches, Witchy.

Coffinmate

By warandpeass | October 15, 2023

5 panel comic by War and Peas: 1. Slutty Witch has a date over. She points at a coffin and says, "And here's the coffin I share with my ex-boyfriend." 2. "He's a vampire so it's fine!" 3. "He sleeps during the day and I sleep at night." 4. "Rents are through the roof so it's pretty clever if you think about it." 5. The coffin opens and the vampire looks outside. He says, "I can scoot over if you guys want to get jiggy with it!"

Posted in Absurd Humor, Comics, Sexy Humor and tagged as Best of Slutty Witch, coffin, comic, comic strip, date, ex, ex boyfriend, friends, funny, humor, lol, Slutty Witch, vamp, vampire, war and peas, webcomic, witch, witches, Witchy.

Stylish

By warandpeass | October 14, 2023

Cartoon by War and Peas showing a vampire saying, "It's hard being that stylish when you can't see yourself in the mirror."

Posted in Cartoons and tagged as Cartoon, cartoons, dracula, fashion, funny, humor, lol, New Yorker, vamp, vampire, vampires, war and peas.

Vampire Tinder

By warandpeass | October 12, 2023

Comic called Vampire Tinder. A vampire girl swipes through Tinder but none of the profiles show any person because Vampires are invisible to cameras. She sighs.

Click the link to Patreon to help us to continue making comics full-time! If you’re already a patron: You are amazing! Thank you so much, it really means the world to us.

Posted in Absurd Humor, Comics, Hilarious Comics and tagged as Bumble, Cassius, comic, Dante, Edward, Elvira, funny, humor, Hunter, invisible, Jezebel, Lestat, lol, tinder, vamp, vampire, Vampire Lady, vampires, Vlas, war and peas, webcomic.
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Thanks for visiting War and Peas. We've been making comics for over a decade. To find out more about us read our FAQ. To buy prints and books, visit our shop. If you have any questions contact us. ✌️Elizabeth and Jonathan✌️

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