Unlimited Power
We know you like the comics or you wouldn’t be here. We tackle life’s big questions: Why are we here? Where do we come from? And why do worms make us so horny?
To be honest: Life as an artist is less glamorous than many people imagine. From the outside, it looks almost exactly like a regular office job (minus the coworkers and the free coffee). But there’s a key difference: We don’t just have one single boss, we have many! Our Patreon supporters are the generous engine that decides whether and how much we get paid.
If you’d like to be one of our bosses, head over to Patreon and help keep this silly little world alive.
PS: If money’s tight right now: seriously, no worries. The comics stay free, no strings. We’re glad you’re here and paying attention, which is its own quiet kind of support.
The Cheapest Gym in the World
The Longevity Hack
Everyone is looking for the fountain of youth–but dare we say, we probably found it.
It’s a fact, that laughter extends your life. Nothing rejuvenates the mind, body, and soul like a good chuckle. And we mean that whole-hearted laughter that comes from actual human-made art, not whatever algorithm-generated slop is currently clogging your feed like arterial plaque.
Now, here’s our proposition: You get the ultimate longevity hack, the key to an endless stream of funny stuff, and we get to make a living.
Our supporters on Patreon are already in on it. They’re not just getting bonus comics, early access, and downloadable art – though they are getting those things. No, what they’re really getting is more life.
Think about it. Every comic you see before the general public is another laugh you get ahead of the mortality curve. You’re literally time-traveling into a funnier, longer future. The rest of the world is brain-rotting away while you’re chuckling at Sunday’s comic on a Friday like some dashing Doc Brown.
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A Funnier, Longer Life
If you want to take your hack to the next level, you can sign up for an actual physical love letter. In the mail. Remember mail? That thing that used to bring us things other than bills and ads?
This love letter arrives filled with a holographic sticker, a surprise item from the exclusive subscriber vault of wonders (cartoon magnets that will hold your nephew’s drawing to your fridge way better than those real estate agent freebies; bumper stickers that might cause a pile-up on the freeway; key chains that will hold your keys while also broadcasting your artistic taste), sealed with actual love and confetti.
When was the last time you opened your mail and confetti fell onto your driveway? When was the last time anything in your life involved confetti that wasn’t shredding financial documents before your shady boss’s tax audit. This confetti celebrates your longer life.
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Don’t Die
The science is unimpeachable: human-made art makes you laugh, laughter releases endorphins, endorphins are basically tiny maintenance workers repairing your insides, and boom: you’ve just extended your warranty.
And unlike those sketchy supplement companies or that one guy in Yoga class who won’t shut up about intermittent fasting, we’re offering you a path to longevity that involves more laughter, not less food.
So really becoming a Patreon supporter isn’t just supporting an artist. It’s an investment in your own continued existence. Your move, mortal.
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Restraint
We’re doing something we usually don’t do by giving you a peek behind the curtains. This is the stuff our beautiful supporters usually get for keeping us financially viable enough to joking around.
Join the party and read the rest of the exclusive stories!
We definitely told our patrons this would stay exclusive, and now we’re essentially that friend who swears secrecy then immediately tells everybody your embarrassing story on the school yard. The guilt is consuming us like a shame-based brain worm. Our only chance is to make the next secret comics so hilarious that our supporters will forgive this betrayal – comedy so sharp it could perform its own appendectomy. Please don’t revoke our kneecaps!
Join the Party Now!
Throwing Confetti Into a Hurricane
Having 1 million followers is like throwing confetti into a hurricane: people cheer, platforms profit, and you’re left sweeping your own glitter off the floor. Everyone loves the art, shares it, while we’re over here perfecting the art of checking our bank balance with one eye closed.
Platforms Stole Our Pay, AI Stole Our Art
Now AI companies are scraping our “worthless” art to train billion-dollar generators. Apparently our work was valuable enough to steal, just not valuable enough to pay for. It’s like being robbed by someone who insists they’re doing you a favor by “increasing your exposure.”
So here we are on Patreon, asking our actual fans to bridge the gap between “viral content” and “paying rent.” Because in this rigged game, the only reliable currency left is people who genuinely give a damn about creators surviving.
Go to Patreon
Go to Patreon
Make Your Mailbox Lovely Again
Every month, we craft you a real letter. Not an email. Not a notification. A letter. The kind that arrives in your mailbox between the electric bill and the note from your dentist about overdue cleanings, except this one contains an exclusive poem we wrote specifically for this moment in time, a holographic sticker that’ll make your inner eight-year-old weep with joy, and some surprise product that might be a postcard, might be a magnet, might be temporary tattoos, might be – and yes, this actually happened – an air freshener shaped like a witch on a skateboard.
It’s the kind of thing that makes you pause at your mailbox, feeling briefly like the main character of your own life instead of just someone scrolling through other people’s curated breakfast photos.
Also – and this is crucial, too – you get all the extras from the Patreon levels below: That gives you the opportunity to view comics before the wide public, download wallpapers and to take a look behind the scenes of making funny comics!
The People Behind Internet Art
The algorithm-driven attention economy has turned art into something that’s supposed to be free, consumed in scrolls and taps between subway stops. We’re told success means millions of likes from strangers who’ll forget our work before their coffee gets cold.
But then there’s Patreon – this strange little economic rebellion where actual humans decide that something matters enough to support it directly. Because it resonates in some small, meaningful way with their actual lives.
When you pledge, even if it’s just a few dollars, what you’re really saying is: “I see the sweat-soaked 3 AM T-shirts. I see the scrapped drafts. I see the weekends spent indoors while everyone else is at brunch. And I think your art matters.”
Supporting our webcomic isn’t just about keeping the lights on (although electric companies are insistent about being paid). It’s about creating a tiny ecosystem where art can develop according to its own internal logic rather than chasing whatever social media companies decide is momentarily engaging.
So thank you – for being the kind of person who understands that the people behind internet art need support to thrive. Your contribution makes a difference.
Well yes, but actually no
Yes, we have millions of followers and social media is great for validation, but not so much for paying bills. Turns out, likes and shares don’t magically turn into rent money.
Platforms don’t pay us, and while some of you do (which we deeply appreciate), the conversion rate is… laughably low. If exposure paid rent, we’d be landlords. But alas.
So, if you enjoy what we do and want to keep seeing it, Patreon is where that magic happens. No pressure – just an invitation to be part of the reason this stays sustainable.
The Choice is Yours
We know you like the comics, or you wouldn’t be here. Making up stories that poke at the weird, messy questions (why we’re here, what’s real, how horny a worm with boobs can make us) that’s what we do. And it’s hard sometimes. Not the glamorous kind of hard, but the endless, detail-rich kind that demands time, focus, and the support of a community who believes in it.
Does It Matter?
By joining us on Patreon, you’re not just a supporter; you’re a fellow traveler on this messy, fascinating journey. Your support means we can keep diving deeper, creating absurd and funny stories that build spaces where laughter rules and not negativity and hate. Whether you choose the well-worn road of free content or the brighter path of patronage, we’re grateful you’re here, reading, considering, and maybe – just maybe – taking a step further with us.
After all, it’s not just about paying for content; it’s about saying, “Yes, I believe this matters.”
Go to Patreon
